fingernails.She used to chew her fingernails.Now,she digs craters in her arms,and mars her skin with scars.I used to tease her about digging for her golden heart, and barreling through her veins in mining carts.Now,I realize shes digging for all her insecurities..I watch her as her lips move in silent repetition,My name is Angel.My name is Angel.My name is- and her fingernails line her shoulder blades in red. She smiles like innocence and makes me wonder if the fists pounding against cushioned walls and the eyes filled with nothing but white spaces are really angels screaming for home.
Not The Girl You Think I AmI'm not the girl you think I amI promise I never will beI'm not what you expect and knowJust open your eyes and seeI'm not as simple and innocentAs you all want to thinkI'm not so cute and I'm not sweetSo take another drinkBecause when you see the real meYou'll wish you never knewThat one day I'm going to hurt youOne day I'll fall throughSo you want to know the truth?To pull away the covers?Well the girl I really am you knowHas a heart a different colourI could tell you just who I amAnd who I want to bebut who I'm not is more importantSo tell me what you seeYou see the girl you think I amBut I've been fooling youI'll push you hard and knock you downAnd maybe tell you the truthYou think you understand meThe reason why my heart beatsBut you didn't see me run awayDown jagged city streetsI'm brave and strong and wonderfulThat's what you seem to knowBut I'm cracked and I'm a cowardAnd the courage is all a showPlastic smiles have stolen momentsWhen you could
We weren't stolen or lost...Who will standFor the girls with broken heartsAnd too much make-up and too-short skirtWho cry for something betterThan petty drunk - 'it was just one night' - loveWho will screamFor the whisky breath boysWho broke hearts to hideHow scared they really areThat you'll find out who they really areWho will fightFor the skinny girls obsessed with numbersNever quite low enoughAnd they want shoulder blades and pelvic bonesAnd beauty and disgustWho will speakFor the kids who stay silentAnd hide bruises under pretty clothesWith smiles that break your heartWhen you look into their eyesWho will reachFor tobacco-breath girlsWith combat boots and a fuck off glareTo hide nightmares from the pastBecause no one will get close againWho will smileAt the ones with tear stained cheeksAnd long sleeeves all year 'roundWho are told it's 'just a phase'When they know that they are dieingAnd destruction will be cause of death
DepressionSleeping behind the cool lines of emotionBiding their time, not willing to take a dareGrinning evilly while I try to stay out of commotionGiggling maniacally while I try to see whereFeasting upon the curling cinders of my painDigging its claws into my already cracked heartWatching me as I wait for the rainTearing my life apart
TiredTrying to get myself up.Surrounded by dirty cups.Really need some motivation.Tired of this bored sensation.Want to get up and clean.Or go out and be seen.Want to go out for a walk.Or call a friend and talk.Turn up the music and sing.Just want to do something.Hope that I don't get fired.So tired of just being tired.
It's Time To ScreamIt seems to meI have lost my wordsSomewhere in the mess and dull lightsof this cityPerhaps I spoke too quietPerhaps I screamed too loudOr I just don't deserve themMaybe they ranLike I ran from the tearsUntil I stoppedListenedAnd still no wordsAll this running has only leftMy feet cracked and dryAnd my lungs sore and tiredSo I still want to scream"It's time you stopped this"I told them I don't know how and I won'tUntil I find those wordsThat will arrange to spell what 'this' isThey will make you fallWith the weight from my stone heartIt suddenly becomes apparentI have lost my wordsThey lost meaning in the devastation of this city andthe fog that collapsed my lungs
Walk Away, Im doneWalk awayThe lies, deceitYou've pushed meToo farLeave me hereI was fineTil you opened your fucking mouthI dont need itI dont need you.Just walk away.
What Do You Do?What do you do when your world's falling downAnd no hands reach out to save you?What do you do when tears fall from a frownAnd when you think of yourself you say 'Who'?What do you do when no one sees your painAnd people seem to make it worse?What do you do when frustration must be refrainedAnd every further step hurts?What do you do when you feel like falling downAnd just want to leave life behind....
GhostGhosti hold my own wrist,as if it's broken,'cause there are no hands,available left to hold it.to rest in the baseof your touch cannot happen.it's much too tough to ask.so i sit staringinto a blank field,eyelids empty, body in reverie,mind in ennui,sick of you and i.i love youbut hate i fell toodeep into the pool,of what I thought was true.5 feet, 5 inches,brown locks,spectacled eyesonce folded around my 5'7'' frame,now left a shell.my arms hold me,as i clutch my abdomen,and rest against the floor.i lie there,knowing the pain will finally stopbut aware,that it's just beginning.because the hardestpart about this,is loving a ghostthat isn't dead in body,but in your mind,and you can't kill her,no matter how muchyou wanna take the gunand pull the trigger.so i let pellucid phantomsperplex the crevicesof my intricate labyrinth.and i let the apparitionfly around inside,before it fades and dissipates,just like the b